Erev Yom Kippur Evening Service           Sunday, September 27^th September , 7pm

                This evening we recited Kol Nidre the Aramaic “formula” which has been recited on Yom Kippur for over a thousand years.  We know how it makes us feel, but what is it really? A request to God that we be released of our vows.  While Kol Nidre is translated as “all of our vows” the prayer only refers to vows assumed by individuals solely for themselves, in instances where no other persons or their interest are involved.  All vows concerning others are to be addressed Prior to Yom Kippur, on Rosh Hashanah and during Elul-the month prior to Rosh Hashanah, during which time we are required to take stock of and make amends for our actions as they pertain to others, reflect on and be accountable for the previous year and cultivate understandings that will guide and shape our deeds in the upcoming year. 

As Jews the High Holidays are the time that we look to “re-negotiate” a one year “lease on life”, a Contractual relationship with God that is up for renewal yearly.  As Jews, we see ourselves as “contractually” bound to our Creator this relationship of mutual understanding we call the Brit (the Covenant)

The very theology of Judaism is predicated on the foundation of a Contractual Relationship.  Sarah and Abraham forged the first Brit with God and each and every subsequent Jew assumes the individual and personal responsibility of that Covenant.  Judaism is unique in that just as “we are dependent on God” so “God is dependent on us”.  The express contract that is the basis of the relationship between God and each and every Jew is realized through our Covenant.

                Kol Nidre, is an ancient, stringent and highly formalized formula to rescind a vow made that the individual did not successfully uphold.  These words carry incredible import.  Significant in part because they are uttered on what we consider to be the “holiest” of all nights of the year.  Vital because it reflects the understandings that we negotiate with God.  But most important, Kol Nidre sensitizes us to the power of the word.  The centrality of the Kol Nidre in the High Holiday liturgy cements the understanding that words are the foundation for embracing life and fullness.

                In Deuteronomy 23:22-24 the Torah delivers judgment about the grave responsibility of our words.  Talmudic and Halachic material follows accordingly.  Our word is our vow.  Vows are binding.  Making and/or breaking one’s word is paramount to sacrilege.  

                “And God said, let there be... and there was!” by the word God brought the universe into being.  Words define our relationships, with God.  Words define our relationships with one another.

                Just as Sarah and Abraham entered into the Covenant with God, so too do we enter our children into the Covenant with God by words.

                A 13 year old marks her or his rite of passage by reading words of Torah.  

                When two Jews are to marry they prepare a written contract, a Ketubah.  It is the words in the Ketubah that in ancient times “protected” a women’s rights in a world devoid of women’s rights.  It is the word of the Ketubah, in modern day that articulates the guarantees and commitments to provide for one another, by the couple for their union.

According to Halachah, a Jewish wedding ceremony need not be performed by a Rabbi.  The couple needs only to consent of their own free will, to exchange something whose value is greater than a p’rutah (an Aramaic penny) and say a formula of words in the presence of two witnesses. 

We believe that we accompany a loved one’s soul to their final resting place by pronouncing the words of Mourner’s Kaddish each and every day during the year following our loved one’s death.

Words are binding and transformative.  With words God creates.  With words we alter our personal status.  With words we connect to those who have died.  With words we request release from unfulfilled vows as a means of securing an inscription in the book of life for the upcoming year.  Words words words.

More than any other single fundamental change in modern society, our culture has witnessed a radical shift in how we experience the words that define how we date, how we parent, how we maintain friendships, how we work, how we campaign, and even how we minister to our religious needs.

J-date or e-harmony, the traditional “matchmaker” has been replaced by an internet experience.  Select your sight, enter your statistics and explore your prospects.  In a world where careers come first, individuals work long hours, the fabric of community is fragmented at best, internet dating is a widely used tool that people employ to maximize their exposure and minimize their time and possible incompatibility with potential mates; selecting profiles that one might have more in common with. 

Balancing between professional and personal commitments, our children’s cell phones have become their adult chaperones; let me know when you arrive, where you will be and when you need to be picked up. 

Friendships have a new definition.  The no longer require play dates, common adventures or even the sharing of secrets.  Face book has transformed friendships with “friending”.  You share my “wall” and then I can “friend” request you.  And even if you I don’t, while we are on the same face book page, we each see and know what everyone else sights and says on the common wall.

Forget filling out an application… apply on line.  Inter-office computer communication minimizes or obviates the necessity of meetings.  Our Communication maximizes efficiency and minimizes waste be it time, energy or resources.

Radical changes in Communication can be revolutionary.  We witnessed the world of texting as it mobilized the young voters in unprecedented numbers to participate and have their voice heard in the 2009 Presidential elections.   We watched as the world was informed about the moment to moment political ramifications tempering the oppressive attempts of the Iranian Regime to silence peaceful protests and political dissonance in their last elections.  Even in our little Congregation here in Kingston, we are able to transform an important arm of our Communication, by putting our monthly Bulletin on line, we are able to save cost, maximize our attempts for greening the Temple and still communicate broadly and effectively to our members.

But the world of instantaneous communication has also put us at risk in a multiplicity of ways.  We are facing a new epidemic assuming frightening proportions.   Still without effective means for eradicating drunk driving, we are now facing an increase in accidents and fatalities where the driver at fault was speaking on a cell phone or even more a grievous, driving while texting.  This phenomena cell phone use, while not limited to, is blatant and pronounced among younger less experienced drivers.

Internet bullying, internet vulgarity and internet promiscuity indicate a dissociative pattern where our world of e-communication has fostered a false sense of security, loss of inhibitions and a general breakdown of social protocols and mores.

Suddenly when friending on face book, distanced and disassociated from the constrains of face to face communication, with a pretense of being shielded by the electronic screen, we and our children are more likely to be exposed to and to express instantaneous, superficial and reactionary communications in relationship to our electronic counterparts.  Whatever is shared or absorbed from or too cyberspace is simultaneously shared with multiple parties, those that we might be aware of and others of whom we have limited or no knowledge of who they are or might be.

Today I am not addressing the potential physical threat that the internet and e-communications pose to our society.  Today I am speaking to the ways that instantaneous communication has impacted the very fabric of our relationships, altered our communications and essentially cheapened our words.

Like our communications, we have cultivated a society in which we expect instantaneous feedback and gratification.  Like our communications, we have fostered relationships that potentially reach to expansive numbers and places but do not necessitate depth or discerning judgment.  Like our communications we have maximized exposure while minimizing privacy and intimacy.

I shoot words out into cyberspace, fast and furiously, not certain about their veracity, not accountable for my judgment, not weighing the implications.  Instantaneous communications shield me from your eyes, from your body language, from your heart.  I say it because I can, regardless of where and to whom these words will arrive.

Many members of this community would faster shoot me a 3 page e-mail then call and make an appointment or show up for Communal Sabbath Services. 

Words words words.  Instantaneous communication is the oxymoron to the Kol Nidre.  It represents a potential world where accountability for the words we put out there is sketchy at best.  Yet it is the means to which we have defaulted multiple aspects of our lives.

Kol Nidre, tonight and tomorrow, you are being asked to sit, listen, reflect, absorb, hear, process, be accountable to and for… not instantaneous feedback of 120 characters that you can send on your phone to your twitter community.  In fact, I am urging you, to lay down your watches, your cell phones, your blackberries and to imagine what it can feel like to be with your Jewish Community, with your family, with your Creator without the distractions that have distanced us from ourselves.

We find synagogue challenging.  We aren’t used to sitting for this long.  We are not accustomed to having our attention undivided.  Prayer, study, the Sabbath, Jewish values… they do not provide instantaneous entertainment and stimulation but rather require a commitment to practice, ritual, repetition, humility and journey of values and accountability that what you say and do matters.  Remember, at least for today, that your Community is your lifeline.  That the discipline of religious practice has no short cuts.  That you really believe there is more than instantaneous gratification and feedback and that the teachings and practice of your Judaism offers you invaluable roots, ethics and the foundation for meeting and addressing the world.

Imagine, just for today, that disassociating yourself from the things, may enable you to connect to the thing that is greater, more pressing and more real than all of the high-speed jargon that bombards our relationships, families and psyches.

Sit still today and tomorrow, listen to, speak and sing the words of your people, the words of your past, the words that define your beliefs and allow this experience and these words to transform you.

Rabbi Yael Romer, Erev Yom Kippur 5770